It has been almost six months since I posted a blog. I have a plethora full of unfinished drafts in my folder, which when I started writing, really had my interest. But now when I get back to finishing them, I am not liking them so much. Or rather, at all.
What really happens to us with time?
I wonder if I have changed?
When I look back at how I was last year this time, at a superficial level, everything seems same. I am the same person. I enjoy the same movies, vibe to the same songs, and hang out with the same friends. I wear same kind of clothes. How I spend my day is also more or less the same.
The only difference, I feel, is that I have become quieter.
But that is normal. We become more introverted as we grow older. (Right? Or maybe not?)
So, if I have not changed, what has?
Why does it feel like the world is changing?
I feel more alienated. Honestly, I have never been the super-social kind; I need my time to get along with people.
But lately it feels like everybody is talking, and yet, nobody is listening. Everyone is hearing only to react. The ability to just listen and understand someone else is gradually vanishing. The sadder thing is, nobody is listening to their inner voice too.
There is a constant background noise in our lives that doesn’t let us distinguish between what’s important and what is not. And because we’ve got so used to living in that background noise, a sense of calmness and stability feels like boredom.
Of course, like in every situation, there are two sides to this too and generalizing will be wrong.
The universe is an enigmatic place with so many aspects that we cannot yet fathom. The world is a beautiful place with so many facets that we have not yet seen. Maybe one day I will find my part in the world. Maybe one day I will fit in.
PS: Is it too late to wish Happy New Year?
-Sanketa Raut
Samay and Solace 